The Deep Ball

Peyton Manning didn't play great in the first game of this season with new coach Gary Kubiak, completing 24 of 40 passes for 175 yards, an interception, and a rather low 59.9 rating. He's currently about halfway done with game two and not playing spectacular, but does finally have a TD. People are questioning his arm strength and whether he's beyond the twilight of his career. Whether he's done or not is silly to discuss after only one week and with a new coach on top of it.

On a side note, I just looked up Peyton's career totals, and he's just shy of 70,000 yards.

70,000 yard. 70,000. Yards. 3 feet per yard. That's like 1,000,000 feet or something.

And Brett Favre had OVER 70,000 yards, 71,838 yards total.

70,000 yards is 40 MILES. 40 miles, as in miles as in the worst day in gym class every semester except instead of running the great 4 lap equalizer these guys threw a football that far. 40 TIMES. Imagine hustling around the track, trying not to be a try-hard but also making sure you're keeping a respectable distance ahead of that one kid who's been practicing running as if he were an anime character, when suddenly a football whizzes around the track. Yes that's impossible with the curves, but it would force you right into the locker room for a fresh full-body coat of Axe spray.

Say what you will about two of the best ever, but just remember the next time you're talking trash from the couch that Peyton and Brett have thrown the football for about one and a half marathons. That's one and a half marathons farther than real armchair quarterbacks throw, let alone run. And a half marathon farther than sad 27 year olds who realize they hate the generic financial job that's now become a career run while trying to prove to everyone they have other interests outside of work. Ugh, people who discover running and working out after college. Yeah, we get it, you're always talking about it and posting pictures about it. I'm the only guy with the stones to say it: no one cares about your marathon. If you really need to get to bed early so you can "train" in the morning, just go already. You've been talking at me about it for a whole quarter of this game now.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to this game. I have a lot left to study for one of the several games I'll be coaching from my couch next week.